When Elizabeth Hanley talks about how to focus on solutions, you can hear, see and feel the passion of her convictions. She shines.
She was faced with a layoff from a dream job, evicted from her rental place and the writing was on the wall with her boyfriend at the same time.
She was so down and depressed she took off from work, crawled in bed and hid beneath the covers. She slept till noon and finally switched on the TV and through her tears heard Dr. Phil ask, ‘if you were the owner of your own business and you had a manager who was running the business into the ground, would you keep hiring them or fire that person?’
Then continued: ‘You are the manager of your life, are you getting the results you want out of life? Are you achieving happiness, health, success or are you miserable, unhealthy and feel like a failure? Would you keep hiring yourself or would you fire yourself?’
“Oh I am so fired!” she realized, and the light bulb went on when he explained ‘you need to require more of yourself’.
She realized she needed to focus on solutions, fire the old me and get the new me started on better managing her life. Being a librarian, she embarked on a nearly obsessive research effort that would bring about a personal evolution and transformation.
Her new book, No Problem! How to Focus on Solutions captures the wisdom and essence of her most important and helpful discoveries and guidance about how to thrive and not just survive.
“Problems were sucking the joy out of my life and I was letting it happen.
After sinking into and soaking up the works and teachings of the many masters I found, I came to the conclusion that I could focus on solutions by simplifying what I needed to do into four simple tips.
This became my basic simple ‘problem solving guide’ which I could use for the more tricky problems”.
Tips to help you focus on solutions:
- Define – see it as it is.
- Own – take control and feel the power.
- Truth - see the truth and the path to a solution becomes clearer.
- Balance - see the bigger picture, so problems will not keep you stuck in a rut.
One of the most important things she realized is this:
“You do not react to the events in your life – you react to your thinking about the event.”
When you jump into your car, it’s a given that someone is going to make a mistake and cause a problem. You can expect that and accept that it is going to happen. The real question is how you are going to react to them.
Using the four tips to focus on solutions helps move you from negative thinking onto helpful thinking more quickly and easily so you can focus on solutions.
You can wake up each morning and say to yourself that you know problems are going to happen. You can say to yourself that you won’t let them control you. Then you can take control and focus on solutions to the problem with a cool head.
There will always be problems. Live with them, not in them.
For more information visit www.noproblembook.com
Disagree & Stay in Love - Tips for Fighting Fair
- Take it to a private place & keep it private.
- No put-downs or name calling. Say ‘sorry’ ASAP. Tackle the problem, not the person.
- Ask for what you want, instead of complaining about what you don’t want.
- If you feel you are going to lose your temper – WALK AWAY! Return when you are calm.
- If you win & your partner loses, this means you lose! End arguments in a good spirit. Kiss and make up, let it go or seek help.
Tips from No Problem! By Elizabeth Hanley
Elizabeth Hanley is a Librarian who has worked in public and educational libraries and some specialist libraries. She has a degree in Library and Information Science from Queensland University of Technology, Australia.