Self Confrontation: Why Me? 

Now, the last thing I want to do is add more guilt or shame to your heavy heart. 

However, you must examine why you are the one picked on. You may have the “victim mentality.”  You may have heard of the book and movie The Secret, or the Law of Attraction, which reveals that what we believe or think about will comes true.  If you think of yourself as inferior or not being lovable or capable, you are in a silent way communicating your thoughts to the bully and sending an invitation. Since you own your thoughts, you have a choice to change them and control the situation.  

It is a proven fact that bullies snuff out or psyche out their victims. They do not pick on the brave and the bold. If you were abused or victimized in your home environment or by others as a young child, your challenges are a bit greater for once you have been victimized it is like wearing a neon sign that says, “Come get me.  I am a victim.” When we repeatedly have been victimized, the subconscious mind defines us as such. You must choose not to buy-in. 

Here is how you can turn things around. By the very fact that you are reading this book, you have already begun the change process. By simply becoming more aware of what I have just shared with you, you have brought into your conscious awareness how the subconscious had been controlling your thoughts and behaviors. You now can make a conscious choice and move forward with a boldness that will repel bullies. 

When speaking for bovine veterinarians years ago, one of them mentioned that when you put a herd of cows together, within seconds a pecking order is formed and every cow knows who the “queen cow” will be.  Have you ever wondered how the V formation of geese is formed and which one of the flock takes the head position? That same instinctual behavior exists in human beings which explains who is the bully and the bullied. However, unlike cows and geese, you have conscious choice.  Use it wisely and never allow a bully to define your future.  Reclaim your power and embrace life. 

Edie Raether, known as the Bully Buster, is an international speaker, trainer, and author of The Bully Buster Handbook – How To Stop Bullying, Start Healling and Create Caring Cultures.

Contact her at or (704) 658-8997.  Visit


Amazing Grades: 101 Best Ways To Improve Your Grades Faster